How To Become An Outstanding Stepparent: In 5 Easy Steps!

Are you about to marry someone who already has kids? Well this is a simple guide to insuring that you will get along wonderfully with your new stepchild.


Step One:
      Don't make plans to meet said future stepchild ahead of time. Just move in! Also, whatever you do do not make sure the child is informed ahead of time. Any confusion is simply because the child is immature and doesn't know how to deal with someone randomly appearing in their home.


Step Two:
      Now that you've moved in without telling the stepchild expect to immediately be accepted and treated like a new parent. Also the child is supposed to know what your expectations of them are without you needing to tell them. So when the child fails to treat you like a new parent, or falls short of your expectations the best thing to do is to lecture them. Also, it is completely okay to claim authority in the house, despite the child still having actual parents.


Step Three:
      Deny new stepchild any chances of going somewhere with just their biological parent. This is completely unacceptable that the child would want to talk to their parent without you present and interrupting constantly.


Step Four:
      If lecturing the child yourself has failed do not hesitate to go to your new spouse and complain about how unfairly you are being treated by said child. Also, feel free to add in comments about how lazy and ungrateful you believe the child to be. And remember to compare your childhood to the life of said child, the child should be grateful for this comparison, no matter how irrelevant it may seem. Do not leave this step out, its crucial to maintaining the respect you deserve.


Step Five:
      When all else fails convince your new spouse to evict said child. This will solve all of your problems, and give you more time alone with the new spouse. Oh and don't forget to throw the child's things into boxes without informing said child. And other than when its time for the spouse to pay child support you wont have acknowledged that he/she even has a child.


Oh and at any point during this guide go ahead and tell your stepchild how much you despise their other parent, even when you've never met the other parent. Blame all the child's faults on your spouse's ex.